A Christmas Wish--A Contemporary Erotic Feel Good Christmas Romance (Darkest Fears Christmas Special, Book Four) Read online

  A Christmas Wish

  Darkest Fears Christmas Special

  Book Four

  By

  Clair Delaney

  Also By This Author

  Fallen

  For Him

  Darkest Fears Trilogy Book One

  Freed

  By Him

  Darkest Fears Trilogy Book Two

  Forever

  With Him

  Darkest Fears Trilogy Book Three

  One

  December 2013

  I AM SAT CROSS LEGGED on the sofa in the library, staring down at the fire burning brightly. I was supposed to be taking it easy today, and reading Dan Brown’s Inferno, the new book I bought, but I can't concentrate. It’s Saturday morning, and Tristan is already hard at work in his office, he said it’s because he has so much to do in preparation for us going away in January to Hawaii – it’s still not sunk in yet that we are actually going. I am so excited, yet very nervous too.

  I dreamily gaze out of the window, its pouring down, rain lashing hard against the windows, and my mind wonders back in time again to the day I first met Tristan, and how quickly I fell in love with him. We’ve been together for five blissful months now, which admittedly seems like a lot longer, but in a good way – as life with Tristan just keeps getting better and better. I’m healing more each day, on the inside and outside, and I know it would only be possible with Tristan’s help, his love, and his patience.

  Then I think of everything else that’s happened this year – My Mom passing away, and all the craziness with Susannah, which led to her...leaving us. Danny saving us both from Kane. Rob & Carlos having that scare and then becoming parents, Gladys and Malcolm getting hitched, Joyce losing John then selling up and now living in Florida, Scott & Debs almost splitting, which they haven’t thank god, Tristan’s ex Olivia trying to get him back, my ex Justin trying to get me back, leaving Brighton, flying for the first time, having my very first holiday in Cornwall with Tristan, my new career courtesy of Tristan, and leaving my studio.

  Which makes me think of Bob, and in that moment I decide I will pop over and see him today, even though he was here on Thursday night for tea - I can't help worrying about him, and I miss our daily chats, which makes me feel a little melancholy, so I take a deep breath, and clear my mind of all those things that can get me feeling off kilter, and think about the present.

  Christmas is literally around the corner, well not literally – ok so it’s the 5th of December tomorrow, which doesn’t leave many days for all the things that I should be doing. And it’s my first Christmas with Tristan, as a married woman – I still have to pinch myself that it’s true. That I have Tristan, that I live here, that we are bonded to one another now, no matter what.

  My belly flutters again at the thought of my lovely husband, and for the fact that for the first time in my life, I have a Christmas wish, something that I want – I stopped wishing a long time ago, even though Gladys tried her best to make Christmases magical when I was a kid, and even as an adult – I guess I was just too much of a mess to really appreciate what she was trying to do.

  So, I have decided that I’m going to host Christmas this year, which I've never done before, but as I explained to Tristan last night when I told him of my wish – which he is not too happy about - I want to show my family and friends how much I love and care for them, and how grateful I am for all their help this year. In caring for us both during our recovery; supporting us in our very deep romance that quickly turned to marriage, and for just being there, full stop.

  But most importantly, I want Tristan to have a full on family Christmas, I want to show him that even though his folks are gone, he has a family again, that he’s not alone – I know it affects him more than he says or shows, but now I’m coming to the realisation of how much I actually have to do, and to be honest, I’m having a bit of a meltdown about it. Which is kind of annoying, because it’s exactly what Tristan said would happen. He thinks it’s too much with all that’s happened this year, citing ‘I am still healing’, which is true, but I really want to do this. So I decide to sit calmly, with pen and paper and write everything down, that way I can't fuck it up by forgetting anything.

  Firstly, Tristan and I have no Christmas Decorations, no twinkly lights, tinsel or Christmas Trees. Which is terrible, as Gladys always had them up on the 1st December, but Tristan and I have been so busy, I just haven’t stopped to think about it. So that’s first thing tomorrow – shopping for the above. Tristan is then away for two days, so I’m hoping as it’s such a big house, that Edith will help me decorate before she heads to Devon for the holidays, otherwise I may still be at it come Christmas Eve!

  Secondly, actual presents – Haven’t bought a damn thing! So I definitely need to get Edith’s present sorted tomorrow too, as she’s away the day after, the same as Tristan – I don't even want to begin thinking about how strange the house is going to feel without them both here - quiet and empty, that’s how - I frown at the pen and paper in my hands, and re-read the list.

  Christmas Decorations

  Christmas Presents

  I then decide that the next most important thing on the list is food. Party food for Christmas Eve and then a Turkey with all the trimmings for Christmas Day, then I think - If I don't know who is coming, then how am I to know how much food to buy? - God this hosting thing is stressful!

  Ignoring that thought, I add ‘food’ to the list. Then deciding I need some expert help from Gladys, and her recipes as she always makes everything from scratch including Christmas pudding and mince pies, I get to my feet.

  As I enter the main living area I hear Christmas Carols playing very loudly – Ding Dong Merrily On High to be precise. Edith must have the radio on. As I pass the kitchen I see Edith, she hasn’t noticed me and is singing at the top of her voice to the Christmas Carol, which makes me giggle to myself – Then I wonder if Tristan is actually managing to get any work done?

  Still laughing at the scenario, I grab my fury, knee length winter boots that Tristan bought for me from the utility room, and head back over to the kitchen.

  “Edith!” I shout, trying to gain her attention over the warbling going on. “Edith!” I shout again, as I’m pulling my boots over the top of my jeans.

  She finally spins around with a big smile on her face and turns the radio down. “Oh hello lass, didn’t see you there,” she says, her cheeks pink from her extravagant singing, and if I didn’t know better I’d say Edith’s been on the wine too, but hey, who I am I to judge – It’s Christmas!

  “I’m off out for a while, do you need me to pick anything up on my way back?” I ask.

  “No lass, I did the grocery shopping yesterday,” she says. I really do love her Scottish accent.

  I smile fondly at her. “Ok, see you later. I’m on my mobile if you need me.”

  “Alright lass, have fun,” Edith smiles warmly, then returns to whatever it is she’s cooking up, which makes me stop and turn back around.

  I sigh, feeling guilty. “Edith, you’re not supposed to be cooking at weekends,” I softly scold.

  “Oh, I know. I’m just stocking up the freezer for when I’m away. That way, you and Tristan won't have so much to do,” she replies jubilantly. My heart melts - she really is one of the most kindest people I have ever known.

  I walk into the kitchen and give her a big bear hug. “You’re a superstar Edith, you know that?”

  “Ah, away with you,
” she says, her cheeks flushing red – I think I’ve embarrassed her.

  I smile back at her; then I remember my plan. “Can I ask for a favour Edith?” I say, hoping she’ll say yes.

  “Whatever you need,” she replies, as she stirs the big pot in front of her – I think it’s a casserole?

  “Well, I wanted to ask, would you mind helping me decorate the house before you go away? It’s just it’s so big and’ – “I’d love to,” she interrupts, ‘we can have a sing song as we go from room to room,” she suggests, her tone excited.

  I grin widely at her. “Sounds like fun, and thanks Edith.” Phew!

  “Not a problem,” she says with a smile.

  As I walk back down the hallway, towards Tristan’s office, Edith turns the radio back up and continues singing her Christmas Carols, which brings a big smile to my face.

  I knock on Tristan’s office door, not really sure if he’ll be able to hear me over the music, or Edith’s singing!

  “Come,” I hear him shout – which instantly reminds me of Joyce.

  My mood sinks a little as I think of her, and all that happened. I really wish she was going to be here for Christmas, but I also understand her reasons for not wanting to do that – too many memories of John, which makes my heart constrict for her – I hope she’s doing better. And with that thought I decide to try calling her again tomorrow as we keep missing each other. Feeling down about Joyce and John, and knowing Joyce wouldn’t want me to be, I close my eyes for a second, pick myself back up and enter Tristan’s office.

  He’s sat in his large leather chair, and he’s on a call. His face is serious as he nods and listens intensely. He’s dressed casually in dark blue jeans and a black, long sleeved t-shirt that hugs him in all the right places, and his medium brown hair is all dishevelled, making him look deliciously scrumptious, and so very sexy.

  He glances up, and seeing me, his face instantly changes. His big chocolate brown eyes widen, and turn a softer shade of brown, his frown disappears, and a smile begins to spread across his face. He motions me forward with his left hand, his wedding ring shining brightly as he does, and he keeps it there, held out to me. I smile in return, close the door behind me and skip towards my lovely, sexy, sweet husband.

  Reaching him I place my right hand in his, and he pulls me forward so I fall sideways onto his lap, which makes me chuckle. I wrap my right arm around his neck, and taking in his gorgeous scent, I kiss his exposed neck. It sends shivers to all the right places – and I’m instantly taken back to this morning, and our frolicking around in bed. Which in all honesty, I thought would fade, as it did with Justin, but if anything, our chemistry for one another has only intensified. It’s far stronger and much deeper than I would have thought possible, and I ponder that thought - Maybe it’s because we are both settled now, and have what we both needed and wanted?

  His voice pulls me from my musing. “It does sound like a good investment. What’s your estimate on the return?” He asks, and listens intently to the reply. Yet his hand is squeezing my waist, making me feel wanted and welcome, even though he’s hard at work. I place my left hand over his, and play with his wedding ring. I really do find it very sexy that it represents me, and our deep love for one another.

  “Hmm...I see, let me take another look at the figures. I think it could’ – He listens again, and nods several times. “I understand that Yanif, but I won't take that much of a risk, not anymore.” He looks up at me, and all I can see is love and desire. It stirs my very soul.

  “Alright...and I agree. Let me come back to you in say...’ he looks down at his watch, ‘an hour.” He says then listens for a few more seconds before finally ending the call.

  “Hi,” I whisper, and kiss his neck again.

  “Hi,” he smiles widely at me, his eyes crinkling sweetly at the corners. Then he cups the back of my neck with his hand, pulls me towards him and kisses me, his tongue lapping gently against mine.

  I moan as I sink into the kiss. His scent, his touch, his pure love and adoration for me, are making my legs shake, even though I’m sat on his lap. He pulls back, and we stare at one another for a moment, soft chocolate brown eyes to coral blue, and I know he can feel it too, the love bubble that still surrounds us.

  “I am a very lucky girl,” I whisper, as I place my hand on his cheek.

  He takes my hand, and kisses the inside of my palm. “No, I’m the lucky one,” he tells me.

  I smile widely at his words. “You’re busy,” I say as I scan his desk, there’s lots of paperwork laid out in front of him. “Although, how you’re actually managing to get any work done with’ – “Edith’s singing?” Tristan interrupts, smiling widely.

  “Yes,” I chuckle.

  “It’s no bother,” he says, his warm chocolate eyes smiling back at me.

  “So what are you working on?” I ask, as ever I am always interested in what he does – not that I understand it all.

  “There are plans for a new development on the Marina, luxury apartments. They won't go up until 2017, but it does sound like a good investment.” He says, and I can tell he’s deep in thought about it.

  “How much will they cost, the apartments?” I ask – wondering if it’s something we should look at buying ourselves. I miss being so close to the water, the smell, the sound of the waves, and even though I love this house, I’m starting to think it won’t really be practical for when we start a family – I’ll be up and down the stairs all day and night! – Maybe a big bungalow would suit us?

  He smiles, but his one eyebrow is cocked up in curiosity. “Why do you ask?”

  I feign innocence as I haven’t shared those thoughts with him yet, because in all honesty, I’m not sure when the whole having a baby thing is going to happen, I’m too busy enjoying having him to myself.

  “Just curious,’ I shrug, ‘and you know...making sure you get your monies worth,” I add, as though I know what the hell I’m talking about – which I don't. Money, investments, and profit margins are not my forte.

  He smiles widely at me and chuckles once. “There’s going to be eleven new towers, which will create 853 new homes. A one bedroom apartment will be around the five hundred thousand mark’ – “Five hundred thousand!” I interrupt, my voice high pitched, ‘that’s ridiculous!” I squeak, thoroughly shocked, my mouth gaping open in horror. Jeez!

  Tristan grins widely at me again. “They are luxury apartments my darling, which will be built to the highest specifications and to the kind of clientele they will attract, that’s like spare change to them.”

  I quickly close my mouth, knowing he’s right. I just feel like the poor are getting poorer, and the rich, richer, which makes me feel a little guilty, but then again, I have to remember how much Tristan contributes to charities, and building homes for the poor, so at least I can say that he – no scratch that, we – maybe rich, but at least we do our bit to help.

  “And are they all one bedroom?” I ask.

  He squeezes me around the waist, and smiles again. “No, one, two and three bedrooms, and of course the penthouse,” he tells me.

  I roll my eyes. “You mean the pimp house,” I reply dryly, which makes Tristan burst into laughter.

  It takes him a while, but he finally speaks again. “Why would you say that?” he asks, still chuckling.

  I shrug. “It sounds like a pimp house, ‘the penthouse’, you know...I just imagine some guy, who thinks he’s all that, the kind of male tart that would want one of those, just so he can impress the girls that he brings back to his ‘penthouse’ and they fall for it...” I stop talking because he’s looking at me that way again. “What?” I laugh.

  “I really do love the way your mind works,” he says, ‘don't ever change baby,” he adds, smiling adoringly at me.

  I can't help chuckling. “I won't, I promise.”

  “Good.” And we’re kissing again – It never seems to be enough. As the kiss slows down, I pull back and gaze at him. “So come on, tell me what ridiculo
us price would one have to pay for ‘the penthouse’?” I ask with a chuckle.

  He’s serious again. “It’s not too bad actually, just under 1,2,” he says – he’s talking money language again.

  I cock an eyebrow up at him. “And that means...?”

  “One million, two hundred thousand,” he tells me.

  “And that has four bedrooms?” I ask.

  “No three,” he replies.

  “And how much are the three beds?” I ask.

  “Depends on what model you choose, but they’re going to start at around five-nine and go up to eight,” he tells me.

  I think I have the hang of this money talk. “So, it’s five hundred and ninety thousand, with the top one being eight hundred thousand?” I question.

  “Correct my darling,” he tells me, his voice singing with pride.

  I frown as I think about that. “But why pay for a penthouse that only has three beds, when you can get a three bed for hundreds of thousands less?” I ask, wondering if it’s a silly question.

  “It’s a good question,” Tristan praises, ‘but you have to remember baby, you’re getting the whole of the top floor with the penthouse, it’s a hell of a lot more square footage compared to the three bed,” he says.

  I nod my head, I hadn’t thought of that. “True,” I say, ‘so do you think you’re going to invest?” I ask.

  “We,” he corrects me.

  I roll my eyes. “Yes darling – we,” I reply sarcastically.

  He wraps his other arm around me, and turns slightly, so we’re almost nose to nose. His eyes are penetrating through me that way again, strong, bold, dark and intense. “When are you going to get used to the fact that all this is yours too?” He asks; his tone serious.

  I sigh inwardly. “I don't know Tristan...” I shake my head, ‘probably never,” I add, laughing at myself.

  His eyes close, and he leans his forehead against mine. “All that is mine is yours,” he whispers, reciting what he told me in Cornwall.